Button Nose

He Says:
dango bana=button nose
I was thinking which word is good to write for this blog,then I thought of dango bana. Because the word is regarded as a dirty word to insult especially to girls.
But you know, my wife who is an American pointed out "button nose is a good word".
I couldn't understand why the word is good.
It's a kind of cultual difference,interesting to know.
Because in Japan,sooo many people wish for a big nose.
So especially many jp girls get a nose job for bigger nose.Some of them have a complex about their nose.
So if you say dango bana to people in Japan, so many jp people would be hurt.And they would be happy if you say "you have a big nose".
Strange huh?

She Says:
He wrote this a few weeks ago (His Mother has been visiting, so we haven't had much time for updates). And when I said that people do want a button nose, it's true...
But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that the word "button nose" means slightly different things. To us, a button nose is a nose that's cute and small. But in Japan, it means more flat. As He said, Japanese people tend to compliment a "big nose", but the way they say it, it means a "tall nose", or in other words, a nose that sticks out of your face.

Skanky Ho （どろぼう ねこ）

He Says:
dorobou neko　（どろぼう　ねこ）=theving whore
dorobou is a thief. neko is a cat.
This word is mostly used by girls.
The situation they would use is that there is one couple, another girl loved the boyfriend, and he cheats.
Then the ex-girlfriend would say to the new girlfriend, "dorobou neko!!".
Originally dorobou neko was used by a fish store. But recently we don't see many fish stores,we use the word mostly for love affair stuff or something.
So if you get or steal someone's treasure or something against the person's will,you would be insulted with the word when you are in Japan.

She Says:
This one was a little hard to come up with a good word. I'm not sure that we would usually use the word "thief" in this situation. Usually we might say "skanky ho" or "scheming bitch". But I dunno. What do you think?

Old Fart （くそったれ じじ）

He Says:
kusottare jijii　（くそったれ　じじ）=you shitting old goat!
jijii means old guy like more than 70years old. and kusottare is fucking shit(see the one Dec.14 blog). So you can say this word to old men, but can say to young men. That'll be more powerful insult.
And that'll be so nice if a female uses the word to men.
You can say it to your fucking shit boss or someone.
I bet many japanese don't expect you non-jp people can use this word,
so they would be so surprised when you say this word.
jijii is old man,and old lady is babaa.
So kusottare babaa is also cool to say to them!

She Says:
Mmmmm....I don't have anything to add about this one.

Hooray for Sluts! （やりまん）

He Says:
yariman　（やりまん）=slut
yariman is dirtier word than sirigaru we introduced last time.
As you know,sirigatu means slut,the original meaning is the girls who turn their butts to men for sex(siri=butt,garu=light).
But this time the word of yariman shows the stuff more obviously.
"Yari" means having sex,"man" means a pussy.So it's more direct,and dirtier.

She Says:
This is an interesting one because, in my experience, you can masculinize it and guys will be surprised and insulted if you call them that.
As He mentioned, the "man" (pronounced "mahn") in "yariman" comes from "manko" which means pussy. The word for dick is "chinko". So you can create the word "yarichin", which would mean male-slut. If you're a girl, try calling a guy who's trying to pick you up this and watch his face. So funny!

The next word is...おめこ。

A Light Butt（しりがる）

He Says:
sirigaru　（しりがる）=slut
Usually slut means for women, so Japanese say sirigaru onna(girl) too.
You can use both sirigaru and sirigaru onna.
Both are the same.
The original meaning of sirigaru is light butt(siri=butt,garu=light).
So the word was made by the girls who can turn their butts to men easily for sex.

She Says:
This made me giggle when I saw it because I thought that they were using "garu" as "girl" which is a common thing to do. So I thought it was "butt-girl". Unfortunately it's not...but that might be a way to help you remember the word!

The next word is...やりまん。

The Worst Japanese Word You Can Say （くそったれ）

He Says:
kusottare　（くそったれ）=fucking shit,mother fucker
kusottare is my favorite one. It's very easy to say for me! The original meaning is a shitter in Japanese.
When we feel so angry, we say fucking shit or something. At the same time, Japanese say kusottare.
It's a little interesting both languages has shit in each word.
It'll be more japaneselike accent if you accent in "u" of kusottare!

She Says:
This is by far considered to be the "worst" word that there is in Japanese. It literally means "person who cannot stop the shit from running out of their ass". One wonders if you would use it for someone using diet products like Alli. But I digress...
This word actually has a special meaning for me. Before I met Him, I was living near Tokyo. I had a good friend who I'd known since high school. As we've mentioned before, Tokyo people tend to be a bit more polite and than others in Japan. So while I would always pressure my friend to teach me the dirty words, he never would. He didn't want me messing with "the beautiful language".
Anyway, one night I was out with my girlfriends and this dude picked me up. Well, actually, I suppose his friend picked me up for him. See, the guy didn't speak ANY English, but his friend did. So the guy would talk to his friend in Japanese and the friend would translate. I'm a sucker for any guy that calls me beautiful so...
I decided to go out with him a second time. This time the friend wasn't there, but I was feeling ready to try my Japanese. It completely sucked at the time, but I would always try to ganbatte (do my best). So we're hanging out, having a good time with another friend and his girlfriend (neither of whom spoke English), when all of a sudden, the guy I'm with starts beating the other woman up! What the fuck right? I'm not talking anything playful. He was full-on punching her.
I of course stormed out, trying to get the girl to come with me...but I simply couldn't convey my meaning. I mean, can you imagine how frustrating it was that the worst thing I could call this guy was baka (or "fool")?
When I told this to my Tokyo friend, he finally taught me kusottare. Heh.

The next word is...しりがる。

Oink （めす ぶた）

He Says:
mesu buta　（めす　ぶた） = sow,female pig
This is one of dirtiest words you'll know.
mesu is female, buta is a pig.
So mesu buta is so fat or ugly girl,or a loose girl etc.
If you say this word to girls,immediately our relationship is over..
By the way, we don't say osu buta(=male pig).
But we will show you many dirty words to men little by little later.

She Says:
Seems like being called a pig is a universal insult. Go figure.
I wish we would get to the insults for men. I mean real insults, not just baka. I think He's afraid to let me know cuz I have an uncanny ability to remember all the bad words.

The next word is...オナニー。

Is this really an insult? （こもち ししゃも）

He Says:
komoti sishamo　（こもち　ししゃも） is kind of a funny word.
Originally,kimoti means pregnant, sishamo is a smelt,one of fish.
So a pregnant smelt has so big stomach.
But we japanese use the word for the calf of people.
Some people have so big calves because they exercise much or something.
Then some of Jp say,"they have komoti sishamo in their calves!"
Sometimes I can see people whose calves look like pregnant smelt.
They look they have 2 pregnant smelts in their calves.
But this word is irony,or bad word, so if you say it to jp girls,you know what happens then!?

She Says:
This doesn't translate so well. I don't get it, even after extensive explanation from Him. It just doesn't seem funny or insulting or anything like that to me. I mean, we're not talking about cankles or anything like that...just muscular calves.
I suppose it plays into the idea that women aren't supposed to be muscular at all? But any, I don't really get it.

The next word is...めす　ぶた。

I Smell Bacon ポリ コウ

He Says:
polikou　（ポリ　コウ）=policemen,cops
The word of Polikou is kind of insult to police. Po of Polikou comes from Police.
Actually Police is keisatsu in JP. Policemen (officer) is keisatsu-kan or omawari-san.
But the words are just normal,kind of polite.Then,some of Japanese, especially JP men use polikou.
Some people use like "kuso(fucking) polikou!" after they get the speed violation or something like that.
But please do not say polikou to policemen. Because the word has insult in it.
(But now many polikou are so chicken, so they would ask their boss what to do when they if you call them polikou instead just arresting you.)

She Says:
This seems comparable to calling a police man a "pig" in English. Not exactly a bad word, but still not very nice.

The next word is...ばったもん。

Stop It With the Fools Already （うんぽんたん）

He Says:
unpontan （うんぽんたん）=fool
Fool usually means aho or baka in Japanese,but unpontan too.This word unpontan is kind of soft word to say fool,we use it when we are not so angry with the people,or especially to kids,women who would be so hurt if we say aho or baka.
And this word is so old,they say it's made more than 300 years ago,which was Edo era in Japan.
Japanese use aho or baka many times in daily life,don't use unpontan even though it's the same meaning.
So they would think cool if you can use this old word instead of aho or baka!

She Says:
Good Lord, do we really need another word for fool? It amazes me how almost all insults in Japanese get translated as "fool", when it's just not so common in America. Stronger words in Japanese tend to sound ridiculous when you actually translate them (See hetare.).
Anyway, He says that because of the obscurity, you'll end up looking cool. I'm not so convinced of this. I mean, I think that many English speakers have at times encountered a foreigner who uses out-of-date slang. It doesn't make them cool. We're more likely to laugh AT them. Maybe Japanese people are different though...

Hey Baldy！（はげ）

He Says:
hage　（はげ）=bald

So many japanese men use this word casually. and they also use this word to the people who isn't bald,like a just short-cropped hair people.
And when jp men are angry, they sometimes just insult "hage" to everyone who isn't bald too.
So this word hage is used to insult people.
And bald hair guy tend to be called hage as his nickname..

Variation:
hage atama-bald head
hage oyaji-bald daddy
hage jyousi-bald boss
hage chabin-bald guy like a teapot

She Says:
"Bald" doesn't tend to be too much of an insult in English. I mean, it's not exactly a good thing to be bald...but it's not exactly the worst thing in the world either. It seems to be a much bigger insult in Japanese. He runs a similar blog in Japanese (called Dirty English) and was recently pressing me about the word bald. It was hard to explain that it wasn't a huge insult here.
One thing this word does illustrate though...is how mean Japanese guys can be in their teasing of each other. I mean, here you have a word that's a pretty big insult, yet it's also a common nickname?!?! You wouldn't even believe me if I told you some of the things you'd see guys do to each other on TV. It's just wrong.
Hage chabin is kind of funny though. I wonder if that means "short and stout" also...

The next word is...うんぽんたん。

Lost in Translation （へたれ）

He Says:
Hetare　（へたれ）=coward
Hetare originaly means a farter("he" is a fart,"tare" is ~er.)
But usually Japanese use hetare when the person can't do or hesitates to do such an easy thing.
Espacially young people love to use the word.
It's from Osaka, but now so many people in Japan use the word casually.
This word hetare is comparatively a powerful word, because japanese language doesn't have many dirty words. So if you say it to someone,they would be hurt easier.
For example in a test of your courage in a haunted house with japanese friends, if you are scared so much,you would be said hetare.
But I might be a hetare, because I was so scared my wife's big fart in the silence...

She Says:
Strong words indeed...but can you keep a straight face knowing that you're calling someone a "farter"? I didn't think so...

The next word is...ギャランドゥ。

An Insult in Any Language （まめちん）

He Says:
mame chin　（まめちん）=tiny penis
There is a penis song in which Caneron Diaz and the others sing.
Then they go "Your penis is so big~!!Your penis is too big to fit in here~~!!".
This time,"mame chin" is completely opposite meaning.
Mame means a bean. So it's so small,tiny. If they sang it,like
"Your penis is too small to fit in here~!!".
They say japanese penis are smaller than Americans' in average. Jp guys' penis are said about 5 inches or less.
But mame chin is about 1 inch,like baby size.
If your japanese boyfriend's one were mame chin, please do not say so to your love.
He would be so much hurt by the word from you.
But it would be the best word as a parting shot,"Mame chin!!"

She Says:
I've done extensive research (heh heh) on the myth of the small Japanese penis and I've found it to be wholly untrue. In fact, I would have to say that three out of the five biggest penises I have ever seen in my life have been attached to Japanese men.
Nonetheless, you'll find that Japanese men are totally self-conscious about their size, even if it's normal-sized or huge. And you'll always hear the foreign guys in Japan going on and on about how their Japanese girlfriend said that their dick was SO MUCH BIGGER than Japanese guys' dicks and how they've seen Japanese guys naked in the onsen and can verify that their dicks are small. Well, I've got two little secrets for you:
1. Your girlfriend is bending the truth because she knows it's what you want to hear.
2. Some are show-ers, some are grow-ers dude. And unless you've seen those penises hard, you've got no idea what you're talking about.
I think that telling a guy he's got a small dick is probably a universal insult. Now you know how to do it in Japanese.

This next word is...きもい。

Farting Bug （へこきむし）

He Says:
hekoki mushi　（へこきむし）=fart monster
Sometimes can't you stop farting?
I don't know why, but some people fart constantly.
Maybe,I think I fart a lot accidentaly after eating a garlic food a lot.
By the way,when I had a party with my japanese ex-girlfriend, I did a tremendous fart in front of my friends to make them laugh. They laughed so much, but later, she cried in private so much.
She couldn't believe I farted in front of people, couldn't stand it.
It made a deep crack between us so long. Even though they were our friends.
Especially most of japanese girl are so shy, and tend to think a fart is a taboo. So there are many japanese wives who can't still fart in front of their husband.
My wife does it like a greeting to me everyday,every night though.
Like the answer by fart instead of saying yes when I ask something.

She Says:
What can I say to that except that his farts are not accidental!
Hekoki mushi literally translates to "farting bug" which is pretty cute.

The next word is...いけてる。

Ew（ちんかす）

He Says:
chin-kasu　（ちんかす）=sperm dreg
This is applied way of kasu.
So it's good to use this to men, who seems to be young.

She Says:
"Chin" means "dick" and "kasu" means scum. So looks like we've got "dick scum" or maybe we should say "dick crust". That seems more accurate. Generally used to insult younger men (e.g. 20s or younger).

The next word will be...げす。

They say it's really bad... （かす）

He Says:
kasu　（かす）=dreg,scum
This is a very dirty word to insult someone. Because it's dreg!
You can combine this words with other dirty words to be dirtier. It's like a punch,hook,uppercut!
So maybe Japanese girls will cry or end the relationship with you to be said this dirtiest word!

She Says:
Kasu comes from the scum that floats to the top when making sake or tofu. It's gross and unnecessary. Now, of course, people would use it as an insult, towards someone they think is beneath them. I'd translate this more as scum than dreg. We don't use the word dreg so much.

The next word is...ちんかす。

How about one more you fool? （ぼけなす）

He Says:
bokenasu　（ぼけなす）=idiot
Boke is fool, nasu is egg plant.
Especially used in Osaka. So they would be insult as fool and egg plant which is hard to understand...it's like a double punch.

She Says:
"You are one stupid eggplant."
"Back off, foolish eggplant!"
"Shut the fuck up you dumb eggplant!"
I think this is a word that definitely loses something in translation. I'm not convinced that any foreigner could pull this one off with the type of intensity needed to properly throw this insult. I mean, you could say it all angry-like...but then wouldn't you start to giggle when you thought about what it meant?

The next word is...へんたい。

Could there be more words for "fool"?(ばか)

He Says:
baka　（ばか）=fool
This means also fool, but it's more polite way to say fool than aho or boke.
Because baka is used by Tokyo people(East Japan), who speak standard and polite Japanese.
And Japanese women tend to use this word to say fool.
So, here is a sign...when a girl says baka quietly to you with smile, she may like you, isn't angry so much, just feels comfortable being with you.

She Says:
Great. Another way to say "fool". I'm not sure why this is such a popular insult in Japan. Again, this is another well known "bad Japanese word", but it's not so bad that you wouldn't hear children say it.
But let me tell you a story about "baka". Long before I met my husband, I went out with this guy a couple of times. He didn't really speak much English and I didn't speak much Japanese. The first time we went out, his friend was there to translate. The second time, the friend wasn't there. I thought I'd give it a try. Bad move. Anyway, we were hanging out with his friends, another couple. Suddenly, completely out of nowhere, the guy I was with started punching the other girl. I mean, really punching her. What the hell, right?
Can you imagine what I wanted to call him and how frustrating it was that "baka" was the only insult word I knew at the time?

The next word will be...ぼけなす.

Another Japanese Fool （ぼけ）

He Says:
boke　（ぼけ）=fool
It's almost same meaning with aho (yesterday's dirty word), but boke is dirtier and more impact word than aho.
So saying only boke is already so powerful to hurt in itself.
Basically, boke means dementia.
Used in mostly west Japan(Osaka,Kyoto,Kobe etc), so it'll more impact to use to Tokyo people(East Japan).

She Says:
Boke is an angry word. You don't really say it in jest. Boke literally means "senility". It can really hurt someone if you say it, so don't say it to the people you love. Again, this ones gets translated as "fool", but I would say that a more accurate translation to English would be like calling someone a "retard".

The next word is...ばか。

A Japanese Fool （あほ）

He Says:
aho　（あほ）=fool
Accent is aho. We can use aho to abuse, run the person down.
Aho is used in mostly west Japan (Osaka,Kyoto,Kobe etc).
So it'll more impact to use to Tokyo people(East Japan).

She Says:
Like He said, aho is used mostly in Western Japan, which makes this term "cooler". Essentially it's an insult, but when said among friends, it's more playful teasing. For example, if someone tripped and fell over their own feet, you might call them an aho. But you might also call the guy who cheated on you an aho. (Note that this is not a very strong/angry word. If you were really angry at someone, you'd use other words. Of course, this all depends on the tone and I think you'll know if someone is angry and calling you an aho vs. when you've done something stupid.) Although it gets translated as "fool", that's not really a word that's normal to use in English...I'd translate it more as "jackass" or "dumbass".

The next word will be...ぼけ。